CPO - Lost in Translation

[albion]

CPO has a fine reputation for mangling the English language, usually courtesy of the indefatigable Susan Marie Praeder, whose verbose orotundity and tenuous grasp of the lingo makes opening one of their CD booklets a real treat. Recent purchases have included Reznicek's Schlemihl which has provided some of my favourite Praederisms, which I've endeavoured to re-translate -

The electronic web promising us the virtual fulfillment of all our dreams and desires has come to have its merits after all. For example, if one is looking for literary products whose cultural date of expiration for some unknown reason or other seems to have passed, then one can discover countless wonderful things on secondhand conditions

re-translation - the internet is good for picking up second-hand books

We also encounter in Reznicek a wonderful character who at times could have a quite bilious sense of humor, who was fond of disguising his participation in the things of life in masked distancing, because otherwise he probably would have come apart at the seams

re- translation - Reznicek was a nice guy with problems

A Naked Fat Witch with belly and breasts hanging down comes riding on a sow, after the melody from >Lieber Augustin< has been cited. (Zero-hundred-ninety numbers did not yet exist - who would want it to be out in the open?)

re-translation - 

What other gems of great price can be plucked from CPO's store of wisdom?

[FBerwald]

I happily give you any of the booklets accompanying the Pfitzner. Particularly the notes to the Piano concerto put me off the recording for days..

[Alan Howe]

Well, I've offered my services, but they seem to think that Germans are the best people to translate from their own language into English. Sie spinnen...

[febnyc]

My favorite program notes on cpo come from Eckhardt van den Hoogen.  Although at times impossibly dense, his writing seems to transcend the norms for this genre and almost are mini-biographies, replete with personal impressions and opinions.  And, somewhere in the midst of all those words and phrases and ellipses, is a description of the music.  (Viz: the Weingartner series.)

[Ilja]

CPO is a very small operation and loyalty to co-workers correspondingly high. But they do know about the 'interesting' nature of their translations, I believe...

[Pengelli]

I can barely understand a single word of the notes accompanying their Antheil cd's. The Holbrooke on the other hand is probably their best ever.
On the other hand,CPO could never surpass the often hilariously endearing Soviet era Supraphon. Marvellous! There really should be an award for the best.......I mean worst booklet notes. On the other hand,the booklets were nicely produced though. A pleasure to hold!